Conversation Starters

Topics to talk about

The best topics to talk about are ones the other person knows well: their food, places, hobbies, work and plans. Questions about these are easy to answer and lead to stories, and stories keep a conversation alive.

These things to talk about work with almost anyone:

• Food: the best thing they ate this week, or a family recipe they love.
• Places: a trip they still think about, or a spot nearby that more people should know about.
• Hobbies: something they could talk about for hours.
• Work and school: how they got into it, or a project they are proud of.
• Plans: a goal for this year, or the next trip they want to take.
• Small joys: what puts them in a good mood.
• Shows, books and podcasts: something they would recommend to anyone.
• Growing up: what they loved doing as a kid.

Things to talk about with friends

With friends you already know the basics, so ask about what is new and what you share. Try "What's a memory of us that always cracks you up?" or "What's a goal you'd like us to hold each other to?"

The Friends and Parties situations have more. For game night questions with a bit more drama, use the random question generator.

Conversation starters for a first date

On a first date, ask about things they chose: trips, hobbies, favorite shows. Skip questions that sound like a job interview. Four openers from First dates:

• If you had a free afternoon tomorrow, how would you spend it?
• What's a trip you still think about?
• What's something you're surprisingly good at?
• What's your idea of a perfect lazy Sunday?

Things to talk about with your crush or partner

With a crush, keep it light and about them. Ask how their day went, what they are watching or what made them laugh. Listen more than you talk, and remember the details for next time.

Couples who have been together a while need different questions. The For couples category on the random question generator asks about your shared life, from inside jokes to future plans.

Conversation starters for coworkers

At work, ask about the job and the team, not private life. These help on a first week or at lunch:

• How did you get into this line of work?
• Is there a team tradition I should know about?
• What's the most useful thing you've learned from a coworker?
• What do you do to switch off after a long day?

Conversation starters for networking events

At an event, ask about current work and what they are excited about. Then offer something back, like a name or a resource. Openers from Networking events:

• What's keeping you busy at work right now?
• What's a project you're excited about this year?
• What's the most interesting problem you've worked on lately?
• What's a resource you'd recommend to someone new in your field?

Conversation starters over text

A good text opener is short, specific and easy to answer in one line. A plain "hey" gives the other person nothing to reply to. Press Copy on an opener from Over text and paste it into your chat:

• Random question: beach or mountains?
• Rate your day out of 10. Go.
• What's one good thing from your day?
• Did you end up trying that place?

Conversation starters for family dinner

Go around the table and let each person answer the same question. Older relatives often have the best stories, so ask about the past. From Family dinner:

• What's a family story you never get tired of hearing?
• What was your first job, and what did it teach you?
• What did a normal weekend look like when you were my age?
• What's a tradition we have that you'd never want to skip?

Conversation starters for kids

"How was school?" usually gets "fine." Ask something specific or a little silly instead. From With kids:

• Who did you sit with at lunch today?
• If your toys could talk, what would they say?
• What animal do you think is the funniest?
• What's something you're getting better at?

Small talk, parties and ESL class

Small talk works best when it starts from something you share right now: the place, the host, the food. Small talk openers like "How do you know the host?" give the other person an easy first answer.

At a party, ask about music, costumes and fun plans. "What's a party trick you can pull off?" from Parties often turns into a show.

In an ESL class, openers use plain words and simple grammar, like "How do you get to class every day?" Set How many to 10, press Full screen, and let pairs take turns asking and answering.

Conversation topics for deeper talks

Set the difficulty to Deep when you want more than small talk. These conversation topics ask about choices, changes and values, so save them for people you know or a quiet one on one.

Deep openers work better after a few light ones. Start on Easy, follow the talk where it goes, and bring out a deep question once the other person is relaxed. For a bigger subject to discuss, try the random topic generator, or pick a side with our debate topics.

How to keep a conversation going

A conversation keeps going when each answer gets a reply, not a new question. Five habits help:

1. Ask a follow-up about their answer. Press Talking points for ideas.
2. Share something of your own, then hand the turn back.
3. Ask "what" and "how" questions, which need more than yes or no.
4. Pick up on details. If they mention a trip, ask about the best moment.
5. Let a short pause happen. It gives the other person room to add more.

What to avoid with someone new

Some topics feel personal to people you just met. Wait until they bring these up:

• Money and salary.
• Politics and religion.
• Weight, looks and health.
• Past relationships, or plans for marriage and kids.
• Complaints about work, other people or the event you are at.